Transforming Midlife Financial Anxiety into Empowerment and Growth

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Can you talk about that?

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What is that piece the laws of manifestation come in to when you're helping women with financial counseling?

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Yeah, you are where your attention is and that's why you know the law of attraction and the secret.

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It works well.

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But people are misinterpreting that because our focus a lot of the times is on lack.

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Oh, I'm going to always be broke, I'm always going to be stuck here, I'm always going to be struggling, I'm always going to be.

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You know, this or that that's not well, and that place of focus is, you know, being that.

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You know, sad, frustrated, feeling broke, feeling less than whatever.

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That's what you're going to keep attracting.

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Hi, I'm Linus Woods Mullins and I love to help women to vibe, to be more vibrant, intuitive, beautiful and empowered in their life.

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So come on, let's vibe.

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Some of you may be wondering okay, why is Linus doing a show about money or finances?

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What does that have to do with wellness?

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Well, I have to tell you it has everything to do with your wellness.

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When your finances aren't in order, therein begins that long journey to the abyss of stress and worry and anxiety and depression and all the things that inevitably impact your body.

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So today we're going to kind of peel back the layers and talk about some things that maybe you don't like to talk about, but you know you need to talk about with an expert, someone who deals with this issue with women all the time.

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I'm so glad to have with us today Patti Handy, and Patti Handy is an expert when it comes to talking with women and their finances.

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She's a financial service and corporate banking industry expert.

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She's been a financial advisor and she decided to pursue her passion of financial coaching for women, understanding that money can be overwhelming as a topic and for many, she said, she is passionate about creating financial confidence and peace of mind.

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So, patty, welcome, welcome to the Vibe Living Podcast.

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It's great to have you here today.

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Thank you so much, liz.

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I'm so happy to be here.

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I appreciate you having me on, absolutely, and you have many credentials that could be very helpful when it comes to working with women.

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You're a certified executive coach, you're a certified life coach.

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You even hold a real estate broker's license and you're a published author of four books.

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How did you come to be so passionate about helping women finagle this whole thing around their finances and their financial?

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futures?

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Yeah, great question.

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It actually started kind of during my divorce.

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I actually went through a divorce many years ago.

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My son was 18 months old and I was taken aback by the divorce, a little blindsided, and I remember laying there in a fetal position just sobbing, trying to get through it all.

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And I remember laying there in a fetal position just sobbing, trying to get through it all, and I had this very odd download I call it a God wink where I had this moment where I heard you're going to be okay because you know how to manage your money.

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And in my marriage I was the one that managed the money.

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My ex-husband didn't know anything about finances and I took care of everything.

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And it was a very random download because I wasn't thinking about the money at that time.

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I was thinking about just my son and dealing with life and how can I be at home with him and just all the stuff.

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And I knew I wanted to somehow someday help women, especially those who are sowing solo in life, whether you're divorced, widowed or single by choice.

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And over the course of many years later, during the time as a mortgage advisor and a financial advisor, I had many, many conversations with women and the common theme would come up about the fear and the embarrassment and the overwhelm just when it came to investing, and the discomfort with that conversation.

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So I decided to leave my job as a financial advisor and become a financial coach and help this group, who I just am very passionate about helping.

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And it's like I said, the seed was planted many years ago.

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You know.

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That's so interesting because for many, the aha moment does come during that time of divorce, when women are going through all the finances and taking a look at stuff and realizing, oh my God, what am I going to do?

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Where do I start?

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Especially if all your finances have been commingled or if the man took what used to be which is no longer but used to be the traditional role of handling the finances.

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So when you talk with women, how do you get them to begin to open up about their financial situation?

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Because in your profile I was reading about how you help them deal with the shame and embarrassment.

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How do you go about doing that?

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I usually start where they're at.

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Let's just, we'll start there.

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So some ladies are very open and they, you know, once they reach me they are ready, they're open, they are, you know the walls are down and they just they need that help.

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And some it takes a little bit more conversation, kind of unpacking and unraveling what's going on in their world.

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Oftentimes our conversations are nothing to do with money at all.

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It's just about what's happening in their life and some of the challenges they're having, whether it's with kids or just getting back on their feet.

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And you know, we'll sort of, like I said, peel the onion back, if you will, and determine what's happening in their world and then we'll shift to the money piece.

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And I make it very, very clear early on that this conversation is nothing to be embarrassed about if they bring that up first.

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Nothing to be embarrassed about.

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We weren't taught this in school.

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We typically weren't taught this at home.

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And how are we supposed to know this if nothing was taught to us?

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So that's why I'm a huge proponent of teaching this in those schools today and that's a whole, nother conversation.

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But yeah, so I kind of just start where they're at and we will just walk through that, you know, at a nice slow pace.

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However, I like to, you know, encourage them to stretch themselves and to oftentimes feeling discomfort because that's where you grow and we'll just sort of navigate you oftentimes feeling discomfort because that's where you grow and we'll just sort of navigate.

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You know each individual situation as it unfolds.

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You know you talk a lot about money mindset.

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What is that, and what kind of money mindset should a woman have when she begins this journey?

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Yeah, we all have money mindsets.

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It's basically our relationship with our money and it really comes from our childhood.

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It stems from our childhood.

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So, you know, as a baby to age eight, we took in information and we heard our parents speak about money, we heard our grandparents, whatever conversations were being had.

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We absorbed it into our mind and we didn't have a filter to say that doesn't make sense, that's not true.

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We just took it in as truth.

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We took it in as our just reality and this is the beginning of what's our limiting beliefs.

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So, whether we heard money doesn't grow on trees and rich people are greedy and rich people are only rich because they hurt other people, or if they heard the opposite of there's abundance and prosperity and opportunities everywhere.

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There's lots of ways to share our wealth.

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You know that's an abundant mindset.

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So, depending upon how you grew up and what you grew up in and many of us you know who are, who are in our 40s, 50s, 60s you know we had parents who were raised in the great depression or born in the great depression.

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So their, their stories were of lack and fear and scarcity.

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So we heard that growing up and that created those, those limiting beliefs, creates our thoughts around money and then that creates, creates our experiences or our behaviors, which then brings out the results in our life.

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So if we look at our results, we've got to look at the kind of unpack, what it is that's playing in our subconscious mind, that is, our limiting beliefs.

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So that's the money mindset and there's a lot of that.

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Conversation alone can be a couple hours.

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So that's the money mindset and there's a lot of that.

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Conversation alone can be a couple hours.

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But at the end of the day we need to really hone in on what did we hear growing up?

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What are some of the stories that we heard our parents talking about?

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You know, am I thinking more fear and scarcity and lack, or do I think more from an abundant mindset and that takes time to kind of unravel that?

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When you get to that point, when you unravel that, what's the first step, what's the first thing that women need to be ready to do once they've gotten to this peel back the layers and figured out some things about their money mindset and maybe what they might want to change in terms of how they look at money.

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Step after that.

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Great question.

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So the first step I always share is you know, get a journal and start writing out some of those things that you heard.

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Write out just line by line what things that you heard, and oftentimes two months later like, oh gosh, I remember I heard that too.

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And you go back to that journal and you just write that in.

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The next piece then is finding the holes in that reality, find the lies and prove it to be wrong.

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So if you heard, money doesn't grow on trees and you've got to struggle and hustle and grind to be successful, is that true?

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Is that really what you need to do?

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Do you have to be addicted to stress?

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Do you have to be struggling all the time?

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No, there's lots of people who you've got to work hard, you've got to be proactive and you've got to take action.

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That's inspired, but you don't need to be hustling and grinding and stressed and anxious and all the time to make any money and have success.

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So you find those holes and then you reprogram that to okay.

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Let's talk about the flip side of that.

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There's a lot of opportunity out there, there's a lot of money out there, a lot of wealthy people who are very generous and giving and loving, and you know I always say that money makes you more of what you already are.

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If you're loving and generous and giving, you're going to be more loving and giving when you have more money.

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And if you're a greedy jerk, you'll be a bigger greedy jerk, but you really kind of dial in those holes and then reprogram.

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The other piece that we have to consider, which is a very large part as well, is that we are as a human being.

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We have ancestral trauma.

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We have trauma in us from our great, great great grandparents, who we never met, will never know their story.

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Our parents or grandparents may never know their story if they're still with us.

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So we can't ask those questions and we have to understand that that is playing a part here as well.

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We have that trauma in our DNA, if you will.

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So I also start with saying let's give ourselves some grace as we navigate this, because part of this is not really in our control, but we have the ability to change it.

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Once we determine you know why we are the way we are.

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We do have the control to behave differently, change our mindset, change our relationship, change our thought patterns.

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And then kind of back to your question what do we do?

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It's like okay, once we find those holes, let's reword the, that thought.

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What is it that we're fearing?

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We're programmed for negative bias.

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How do we change that?

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So it's a very proactive constant during the day, every day, all day, kind of action, but it's not this grueling, exhaustive experience.

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It could be a joyful transition of this journey and one step further.

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There are people who do hypnosis, there is breath work, there is meditations, there is inner child work.

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That's really huge healing the inner child.

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There's so many, so many modalities, if you will, that people do and can take on, but just understanding from the beginning that a lot of this is in our subconscious mind and not our conscious mind.

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That's running the ship and we have to be proactive and understanding that you know it's very interesting.

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As you were talking, I was thinking about some one thing that seems to be an ongoing theme in any kind of coaching modality when you're working especially with women and that centers around forgiveness, where does that come in?

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And you're working especially with women and that centers around forgiveness, where does that come in?

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And you're shaking your head.

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So I'm assuming that that's something that you do talk about.

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And when you're talking about generational, you know ancestral things.

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I certainly can understand that as an African-American woman, this is a huge issue and sometimes it's not necessarily even blood relatives, it's just our history.

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Just the other day I was listening to this story again I've heard it many times about what happened in Tulsa, oklahoma, on Black Wall Street.

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Are you familiar with that story?

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I don't know the details, maybe, if you're sure.

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The story is that many years ago, in the early 1900s, there was a community, a Black community, outside of Tulsa, oklahoma, that was very prosperous.

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They had their own banks, their own insurance companies, their own businesses, their own grocery stores.

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It was very prosperous, self-supporting.

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It is said that the dollar turned over 30 times in that community.

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That's how successful it was.

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Well, what happened was an African-American male got into an elevator with a white female.

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The white female came out and complained that he was looking at her, that it was inappropriate, and they decided to go to where he was from, which was in and they have been coexisting in these towns for years to go to this part of Tulsa, oklahoma, and they totally destroyed it.

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8,000 homes were destroyed, thousands were killed.

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They still don't have the full documentation of that Wow, and found out many years later that it wasn't the case.

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No one was ever prosecuted.

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They're still in court to this day trying to at least get an opportunity to have a trial all the way to the Supreme Court.

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Now, that's trauma.

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That's not just trauma for the people who went through there and all their families.

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We don't know how many Fortune 100 companies were lost that day.

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We have no idea how many future billionaires that were African-American were lost, but just the idea of the story and the fact that this happened creates a great bit of trauma and also trauma for the descendants of those people who came in and killed and destroyed that community.

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So when I think about financial trauma or generational trauma, I also think about how it impacts other people who are related to the generational trauma, whether they caused it or not.

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And I think that's a lot of what's going on in this country around the whole issue of money and how it's segmented, so to speak, in society.

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So when you're working with people, and women in particular, and you're talking and they're pulling back the layers of generational trauma, what do you tell them about forgiveness and how do you help them with that?

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Forgiveness and gratitude are two sides of the same coin, if you will, and so crucial in that healing and so crucial in that shift.

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Whether it's forgiveness for yourself, for something, or forgiveness for somebody else that's outside of you.

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It is imperative that you find that forgiveness.

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It's like drinking poison and expecting the other person to be sick.

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Good analogy, Patti.

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Exactly what is that about?

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You're right, they're taking up space in your heart and mind and soul.

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They don't know any different.

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They've gone on and done their life and you're the one who's suffering because you're holding onto this.

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You're holding onto the ball and chain of this anger, frustration, sadness, whatever, and you're only hurting yourself.

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And I had a lot of that healing to do post-divorce.

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I had a lot of that work that I had to get through with that and it came to a point where I forgave.

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And then I also just came to a place of I felt sorry for him.

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I felt sorry for the life that he has led and been leading and you know there'll never be true peace for him.

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And that's when I just thought, wow, I pity him, I kind of feel sorry for him and I then became like free from all the you know the frustration and anger.

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So, as you're dealing with frustration or forgiveness with somebody, you'll have to navigate whatever that circumstances are and that you're dealing with and find a way to achieve that peace by processing it and working through it, putting it in its place and recognizing it that it's only hurting you.

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There's nothing that you are doing that's helping to help you heal, if you're holding on to that forgiveness and that the flip side is gratitude is focusing on all the beautiful things in your life.

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What are the things that are just so precious?

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Whether it's just the cup of coffee you had the morning, whether it's the birds you hear singing outside, whether it's your warm, comfortable bed, whether it's the beautiful relationship you have with your neighbor, whatever it is, there's gratitude everywhere.

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And if we focus on what's right in our world, not what's wrong in our world, that's one of the topics of one of my books for children.

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It was actually a children's book that I wrote the Feeling in my Belly of Peanut Butter and Jelly and it was teaching kids about focusing on what's right in your world, not what's wrong, and that helps you sort of shift that mindset and you come to that place of forgiveness.

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You know that's interesting because I always tell my daughters I have four daughters, they're all in their 30s.

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Now focus on what's working, focus on what's working.

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And I also have learned that forgiveness really frees up space able to usher in other things that are positive, and what you focus on, what you think about, what you ponder on, truly does come to pass.

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You know, and I've been working on principles of manifestation lately, and whenever I get into that vein, it's amazing what happens.

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And you're shaking your head like you know what I'm talking about.

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Can you talk about that?

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Where does that piece the laws of manifestation come in to when you're helping women with financial counseling?

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Yeah, you are where your attention is and that's why you know the law of attraction from the secret.

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It works well.

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But people are misinterpreting that because our focus a lot of the times is on lack.

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Oh, I'm going to always be broke, I'm always going to be stuck here, I'm always going to be struggling, I'm always going to be, you know this or that.

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That's not well, excuse me.

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And that place of focus is, you know, being that.

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You know sad, frustrated, feeling broke, feeling less than whatever.

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That's what you're going to keep attracting.

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If that's what your focus is, you're going to keep attracting that.

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So that's what you're going to manifest as you focus on that.

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So if you're focusing on, you know, the opposite of where you want to be, visualize that place that you want to be and the life that you want to have, whether it's financial, whether it's health, whether it's in a relationship, whatever that is.

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If you focus on that, you manifest that.

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That's what will come to be.

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As you visualize, you feel it in your emotion, you feel it in your body and you keep heading towards that.

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It's like I think Tony Robbins used this analogy when you're on a racetrack, going, you know, 150 miles an hour, you don't say to yourself don't hit the wall, don't hit the wall, don't hit the wall, because you're gonna hit the wall.

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Right, if you focus on you know, stay in your lane, stay in your lane, stay in your lane.

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You're going to be staying in your lane, so don't think about where you don't want to go.

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Think about where you do want to go want to go, yes yeah that's very powerful.

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And that brings me to something else.

00:18:59.951 --> 00:19:02.954
You know a lot of women think, well, it's just too late for me.

00:19:02.954 --> 00:19:24.900
As you know, my podcast is created for women over 40, 40, 50, but the average listener is between 45 and 55 and I'll be 67 in june and when I think about my finances and if I was at, maybe a place where some other women might be at maybe they just got divorced at 60, something they might feel like it's too late for me to make any changes.

00:19:24.900 --> 00:19:26.768
It's too late for me to improve my credit.

00:19:26.768 --> 00:19:28.046
It's too late, too late, too late.

00:19:28.046 --> 00:19:32.832
What do you have to say for those who are in the too late frame of mind?

00:19:33.701 --> 00:19:34.689
It's never too late.

00:19:34.689 --> 00:19:35.940
It's never too late.

00:19:35.940 --> 00:19:38.365
I'm going to be 64 in August.

00:19:38.384 --> 00:19:39.868
You would love that too late it's never too late.

00:19:40.369 --> 00:19:50.728
I'm going to be 64 in August and I I thank you, you as well, and I I feel I left my job, my comfortable financial planning job, last year to go into financial coaching.

00:19:50.728 --> 00:19:55.241
So I made this big pivot, you know, in my 60s big risk, you know I stepped out of my comfort zone.

00:19:55.241 --> 00:19:57.067
So, no, it's not too late.

00:19:57.067 --> 00:20:14.544
And just get educated in what you have now currently as far as finances, where you want to go and create that plan, that roadmap to get to where you want to go on a financial environment, whether it's getting a credit score up or getting your money invested.

00:20:14.544 --> 00:20:24.525
And if you're recently divorced and you've got the settlement and you got to decide what to do with it, get advice from a seasoned professional, not a friend who thinks they know you know good.

00:20:24.525 --> 00:20:26.934
And take your time, trust your gut.

00:20:26.934 --> 00:20:31.107
You know we are very intuitive as women and I think it's important that we just recognize that.

00:20:31.107 --> 00:20:32.711
No, it's never, it's never too late.

00:20:33.259 --> 00:20:43.275
You know, I have to ask you because I'm sure some people are going to be asking this what's the difference between a financial coach and a financial advisor?

00:20:43.539 --> 00:20:44.644
Yeah, I get that all the time.

00:20:44.644 --> 00:20:49.432
So as a financial advisor, I worked at a firm where we actually took in funds.

00:20:49.432 --> 00:21:01.223
We took in our clients' funds and we advised on and managed those funds, put them in assets, did the asset allocation, did the investing for them, strategize with tax situations.

00:21:01.223 --> 00:21:05.313
So we did a lot of financial advice and managing those assets internally.

00:21:06.121 --> 00:21:11.382
As a financial coach, I don't manage money, I don't take anyone's assets in and I can't advise anymore.

00:21:11.382 --> 00:21:15.961
I can't tell you okay, put 10% of your portfolio in this fund and 10% of your portfolio in that fund.

00:21:15.961 --> 00:21:20.509
But I can educate you and that's what a coach does educates you with.

00:21:20.509 --> 00:21:36.027
Here's the market, here's the various funds, here's where you wanna be looking at as far as when you look at how to allocate your assets, how old you are, your risk tolerance, how long it'll be before you need your funds, what are your other sources of income.

00:21:36.027 --> 00:21:39.875
So we look at their entire financial picture and I educate them.

00:21:40.236 --> 00:21:46.173
So they can either educate or they can invest themselves and manage their money themselves, or they can use a financial advisor.

00:21:46.173 --> 00:21:51.545
And now they know the questions to ask and they understand what they're saying when they are having that conversation.

00:21:51.545 --> 00:21:53.646
I help them rebuild their credit.

00:21:53.646 --> 00:21:55.287
I help them dealing with debts.

00:21:55.287 --> 00:21:57.909
I help them dealing with staying on track with the budget.

00:21:57.909 --> 00:22:06.346
Those are typically things that a financial advisor won't do, so our services are very complimentary with each other as an advisor and a coach.

00:22:06.346 --> 00:22:11.525
In fact, there's some financial advising firms are now hiring financial coaches to come in.

00:22:11.885 --> 00:22:14.820
It's interesting why doctors are hiring health coaches?

00:22:14.820 --> 00:22:20.188
Because their thing is that there's so many things that the health coaches focus on that they just don't focus on.

00:22:20.188 --> 00:22:23.142
They don't have the time to do it or it's not their particular expertise.

00:22:23.142 --> 00:22:24.465
So that's another good analogy.

00:22:24.465 --> 00:22:25.248
I understand that.

00:22:25.248 --> 00:22:27.762
So I know all of you are listening or thinking.

00:22:27.762 --> 00:22:28.546
You know what I think.

00:22:28.546 --> 00:22:29.990
I need somebody like this in my life.

00:22:29.990 --> 00:22:39.111
So here's the good news we have all of Patty's information on the show page, all the links to the information that you need to do, because you can help them virtually.

00:22:39.111 --> 00:22:40.132
Is that not right, patty?

00:22:40.551 --> 00:22:41.834
I do all my work virtual.

00:22:41.834 --> 00:22:44.583
Yes, I'm in Southern California and I can help anyone anywhere.

00:22:44.583 --> 00:22:46.911
Fantastic, that is lovely.

00:22:47.071 --> 00:22:50.362
I am so glad that you came on today and I'm so glad that I thought of this idea.

00:22:50.362 --> 00:23:04.561
I really want women to be able to have a well-rounded life, and I know from my own experiences that if the finances ain't there, then you're already going the opposite direction in terms of total wellness for your mind, body and spirit.

00:23:04.561 --> 00:23:07.711
So thank you so much, Patty, for sharing your expertise with us.

00:23:07.711 --> 00:23:09.405
It's been wonderful having you here today.

00:23:09.748 --> 00:23:10.371
Thank you, Linus.

00:23:10.371 --> 00:23:12.038
I was so happy to be here.

00:23:12.038 --> 00:23:13.099
I appreciate you having me on.

00:23:13.099 --> 00:23:16.022
You're welcome and thank you to all of you who've been listening.

00:23:16.123 --> 00:23:26.810
I love it when you get a chance to stop by the Vibe Living Podcast and hopefully these interviews are helping you to figure out how to vibe, how to be more vibrant, more intuitive, beautiful and empowered in midlife.

00:23:26.810 --> 00:23:32.775
Please make sure that you share, that you like, that you comment and subscribe to this podcast.

00:23:32.775 --> 00:23:36.298
Keep us going up the scale on Apple Podcasts for the top 10% of podcasts.

00:23:36.298 --> 00:23:38.222
We want to continue to grow.

00:23:38.222 --> 00:23:44.780
So tell a friend, remember what's it called?

00:23:44.780 --> 00:23:45.523
Oh, sharing is caring.

00:23:45.523 --> 00:23:47.991
Thanks so much for tuning into the Vibe Living Podcast.

00:23:47.991 --> 00:23:49.999
Have a fantastic day and don't forget to vibe.

00:23:49.999 --> 00:23:50.339
Bye-bye everybody.

00:23:50.339 --> 00:23:52.241
Pause right here.

00:23:54.426 --> 00:23:57.813
Okay, we're going to go into bonus interview editors bonus interview.

00:23:57.813 --> 00:23:58.769
Okay, is that a good enough marker?

00:23:58.769 --> 00:23:59.857
Okay, yeah, like when we're going to go into bonus interview editors bonus interview.

00:23:59.857 --> 00:24:00.464
Okay, is that a good enough marker?

00:24:00.464 --> 00:24:03.948
Okay, yeah, like when did I do the whole thing?

00:24:03.948 --> 00:24:06.887
I said oh, I thought if I pause, I said no, say bonus interview.

00:24:06.887 --> 00:24:08.030
So bonus interview.

00:24:08.030 --> 00:24:17.932
Okay, patty, thank you so much for being on the Vibe Living podcast and I just wanted to share a little bit of your wisdom with our Vibe community.

00:24:17.932 --> 00:24:23.750
We have a subscription membership program and I like to be able to kind of share the personal parts Now.

00:24:23.750 --> 00:24:25.602
You have been through a divorce.

00:24:25.602 --> 00:24:33.527
You've worked with many women who have what are maybe the top three things women need to be thinking about financially when they go through a divorce.

00:24:35.069 --> 00:24:36.272
Yeah, that's a great question.

00:24:36.272 --> 00:24:39.741
You know it's so important to watch your credit.

00:24:39.741 --> 00:24:44.306
Oftentimes in a marriage we have joint credit cards, we have joint everything.

00:24:44.306 --> 00:24:47.808
The mortgage is held jointly, everything is held jointly.

00:24:47.808 --> 00:24:52.773
So you've got to almost rebuild because you don't want to keep those joint credit cards open.

00:24:52.773 --> 00:25:02.259
You've got to close those and navigate your own credit and navigate your own credit and you're going to see a little dive in your credit score because you're losing that credit history, unfortunately.

00:25:02.259 --> 00:25:04.487
But it's important to open new credits.

00:25:04.487 --> 00:25:13.410
It's important to start rebuilding that credit and watch those credit scores, because a good credit score can save you thousands of dollars over time.

00:25:13.410 --> 00:25:22.633
When you go to buy a house, when you go to refinance a home, when you go to buy a car, when you go to buy anything, with the interest rate it's always going to be lower interest rate with a higher credit score.

00:25:22.633 --> 00:25:30.185
So that is going to be super imperative when it comes to investing your assets, whether it's retirement money or liquid brokerage money.

00:25:30.507 --> 00:25:34.702
Take your time, especially when it's, you know, fresh out of a divorce.

00:25:34.702 --> 00:25:38.970
You know you're dealing with trauma, you're dealing with grief, you're dealing with trying to get your life back in order.

00:25:38.970 --> 00:25:49.390
You're in this black cloud and I remember I was there and it was just, it was overwhelming, and I can't just can't make a good decision when you're in a place of grief and a place of emotional turmoil.

00:25:49.390 --> 00:26:04.384
So so you know, push pause and and unless you absolutely have to for some legal reason to do something with your monies, don't don't jump into things, especially when it comes to a commissioned person who's telling you an annuity or an insurance product or something that is something you don't understand.

00:26:04.384 --> 00:26:13.339
Make sure you take your time, understand it completely, give yourself some time to really heal and then jump into understanding some of these components.

00:26:13.460 --> 00:26:18.803
If you decide to go that route, talk to trusted financial advisors or trusted financial coaches that you know.

00:26:18.803 --> 00:26:23.258
Your CPA is an independent third party that doesn't care what you invest in.

00:26:23.258 --> 00:26:24.801
They're going to just help you navigate that.

00:26:24.801 --> 00:26:28.170
Perhaps your attorney can help you in some situations.

00:26:28.170 --> 00:26:30.522
But reach out to those who are experienced.

00:26:30.522 --> 00:26:32.047
Stay off the internet.

00:26:32.047 --> 00:26:36.304
There's so much online noise and there's so much oh, you should do this, you should do that.

00:26:36.304 --> 00:26:39.522
It's hard to know and Go to the experts.

00:26:39.522 --> 00:26:40.548
Get the real information.

00:26:40.548 --> 00:26:42.465
Get the real information from the experts.

00:26:42.465 --> 00:26:45.348
Yeah, and not to say that the internet's a bad place.

00:26:45.348 --> 00:26:50.009
There's a lot of very talented, lovely people online, but it's hard to filter if you don't know what you're looking for.

00:26:50.029 --> 00:26:51.373
Yeah, that's right.

00:26:51.373 --> 00:26:54.144
Information is power, and acting on the information is powerful.

00:26:54.144 --> 00:27:01.474
I I always find that we have a tendency, as women, to gather all the information, but then the next step is okay, now I got to act on it.

00:27:01.474 --> 00:27:09.276
And what can you say to encourage women to move forward with whatever it is they do know and not to be?

00:27:09.297 --> 00:27:09.740
afraid to move forward.

00:27:09.740 --> 00:27:15.666
Yeah, well, as I mentioned in the other interview, we are very intuitive and we are, you know, trust that gut feeling.

00:27:15.666 --> 00:27:17.046
Don't be afraid to ask the questions.

00:27:17.046 --> 00:27:18.153
Don't be embarrassed to ask questions.

00:27:18.153 --> 00:27:19.820
Questions, don't be embarrassed to ask questions.

00:27:19.820 --> 00:27:25.026
I remember I was sitting in meetings as a financial advisor and I could tell by the look on their face they weren't understanding what was being said to them.

00:27:25.026 --> 00:27:28.807
And I would ask they would just shake their head, yes, like yes, I guess I get it.

00:27:28.807 --> 00:27:30.721
And later I would say did that make sense?

00:27:30.721 --> 00:27:32.582
They're like no, I have no idea what they were saying.

00:27:32.582 --> 00:27:37.246
And I'm like okay, we've got to get comfortable with asking questions and I've done it myself.

00:27:37.246 --> 00:27:38.906
It's like I'll say you know what?

00:27:38.906 --> 00:27:40.788
I don't know what you just said, I don't understand it.

00:27:40.788 --> 00:27:46.732
Can you please say it differently and talk to me like I'm a fourth grader, I don't know what you just said, and be okay with that.

00:27:46.732 --> 00:27:51.737
And if somebody talks down to you or mistreats you or talks differently because of that, run.

00:27:54.002 --> 00:27:55.204
Right, they're not the one that time.

00:27:55.204 --> 00:28:06.709
You know, when it comes to doctors and things like that, if you're asking questions and the doctor's looking at his watch or he seems to be irritated with you because you're asking these questions, this is your body, you're or, in this case, your finances.

00:28:06.709 --> 00:28:10.108
The person isn't like resonating with you and seems to be impatient.

00:28:10.108 --> 00:28:12.961
Time to find someone else, and there's nothing wrong with that.

00:28:12.961 --> 00:28:18.383
Looking for advisors, doctors, people who are speaking into your life is like buying a pair of shoes.

00:28:18.383 --> 00:28:21.330
Now, when's the last time you bought a pair of shoes that you knew were too small?

00:28:21.330 --> 00:28:24.930
I mean, back in the day, I used to do that, but not anymore.

00:28:24.930 --> 00:28:30.430
Yeah, no, not anymore, not anymore, because comfort is much more important than the way it looks.

00:28:30.430 --> 00:28:35.152
So thank you so much for spending some time with us here in the Vibe community.

00:28:35.152 --> 00:28:38.711
It's been wonderful having your energy in this space.

00:28:38.711 --> 00:28:39.701
Thank you.

00:28:40.365 --> 00:28:40.866
My pleasure.

00:28:54.780 --> 00:29:01.554
Thanks for listening to the Vibe Living Podcast and don't forget to subscribe, like and comment and share this podcast.

00:29:01.554 --> 00:29:04.613
Have a fantastic day and don't forget the vibe.

00:29:04.613 --> 00:29:05.577
Bye, bye, everybody.